Maybe he has a job where he is always traveling and cannot give you the time and attention that you need. Maybe something unexpected occurred and the regular routine of seeing you on a daily or weekly basis just won’t be possible anymore. Or maybe it could be coming from your end and there is a drastic change in your life going on that he notices. He sees that there is something occupying your time and he knows that the timing just isn’t right for you nor is it for him. This happens a lot with potential relationships and it’s neither party’s fault.
Your schedules don’t match
So he went a few days without texting you, and you did what I said and just relaxed and didn’t stress over it … and then he reappeared yay! You’re relieved and so happy to get things back on track. But then he disappears again … And then he comes back … and then he’s gone, and on and on it goes. If he comes back and gives you a reasonable explanation of what happened, then that’s great too. The big thing to realize here is that he needs to come back to you on his own.
Sure, one guy, you’re attracted to physically, but you have nothing in common with him. Another guy might light you up intellectually, but you can’t find a spark of physical attraction. He might even have expressed that he’s interested in a long-term relationship, but if he can’t find that spark, it won’t happen between you two. Okay, so this guy you’ve been dating for months says, “I don’t use social media”. As much as you are so hung up on the idea of having an online presence, this guy may not be open to it. Social media has also saved many of us from venturing into a wild goose chase with guys that weren’t worth the effort.
A narcissistic or abusive man won’t have the capacity to be attuned to you and meet you where you are at. The more a man is only dating for himself and what he can get out of the situation, the less responsive and attuned he will be to you. When two people are in love, they do this naturally, and the roles are switched very naturally too. So whatever his reason is for not texting you, you have every right to ask for more from him.
Well, I reached out to Relationship Hero a few months ago when I was going through a tough patch in my own relationship. And you might think that it’s up to him to “woo” you anyway, so it shouldn’t matter how you behave. Perhaps an ex abused him or cheated on him, and he can’t get that terrible experience out of his mind. There’s actually a fascinating new concept in relationship psychology called the hero instinct. There were various (albeit complicated) reasons I did this, but some of them aren’t so obvious. The thing is, you don’t want to try to convince him to like you instead, that won’t end well.
You’re the one putting in all the effort and planning. But when you don’t put in the effort, you don’t hear from him. Even when you think you’re going to get together, it doesn’t happen. But, the problem is you hardly ever see each other.
If he continues to avoid it, then you may have a problem. Or, he might give you a completely justifiable answer. This is why it’s important to be honest from the start, as it will increase your chances of a happy ending. The possibility that the man you are communicating with does not exist is something no one wants to imagine, but that could be why he is avoiding you.
Men in their 40s are likely to be professionals who go to bed early at night and wake up early every morning. You’ll need to respect that he’s a busy man who won’t be able to respond immediately to your text messages. A one-sided relationship with someone who can’t support or love you in the way you deserve is exhausting. Not to mention, it could even toe the line of a specific type of emotional abuse, called gaslighting. If the person shows no signs of changing their habits, think of moving on as an act of self-care. It’s tough to give up on someone you want, but it will be a lot less painful if you part ways early.
I hope this article
has helped you figure out why your man hasn’t texted you back, and what your
response should be to him. If you’re not
officially together, then perhaps your expectations of him are too high. If you
are in the early stages with him, you might not want to expect too much from
him. If you do, then you might come off as clingy and desperate, which is
one-hundred percent a turn off for a man.
They’re still dating other people.
If you think that he might be scared about falling for you because you’re acting a little cold, then this actually great news. And if you’ve been dating for a while, then ask him out every once in a while. If you think that might be the case, then I can guarantee you that he might be scared about falling for you.
If you are uncomfortable with anything, for whatever reason, then you have the right to feel that way. It is not about right or wrong, it is about how you feel. Personally I think he’s being very reasonable, he made a commitment before he started dating you and he’s sticking to it. So what if he’s sleeping in a separate room or they spend the night in each other’s room. He is single and not committed to anyone so whatever happens happens.
He is emotionally unavailable
People need time to get accustomed to each other’s quirks and personalities. Have you ever liked a guy so much that you wanted to be completely honest with him? The truth is, honesty isn’t always the best policy. That means, just like in video games, they want things more they feel like they’ve earned through careful leveling.
If he doesn’t want you… then he’s always thinking about, “What am I doing after this? ” You’re always just a period of time to him, a chunk of his day. You’re never the reason why he gets out of bed; you’re just another item he checks off the list. Once you’ve spent days, maybe just cougars chat online weeks, just taking certainty in feeling everything (and connecting to yourself this way), you are able to ward off the stress and tension that have built up. So, in conclusion, if a guy doesn’t text you for a week, he’s probably not high-quality enough to be worth your time.
